Sunday, February 26, 2012

Hello, My Name is Roberta and I'm a Gluten Fiend

The Last Supper.



Today’s meals have been a farewell to gluten. For tomorrow begins a 30-day experiment in living completely gluten free. Macaroni, brownies, cookies, pancakes…my diet today has been like the Last Meal for a comfort food-loving prisoner on death row.

My boyfriend thinks I’m crazy and has little faith in any positive results from the experience. But mainly his biggest complaint is that I will force him into a diet he doesn't want. One of my goals in this process is to convince him that he can still enjoy food, even if it is gluten free.

Let’s hit rewind and figure out how I got to this point.


I was born to blue-collar parents in the deep south of Texas during a recession in the early 80s. The recession meant that supermarkets stocked the shelves with what their struggling customers demanded: low-cost meals to feed the family. Thanks to antiquated agricultural subsidies, wheat had become one of the cheapest – and most prevalent – ingredients in nearly every non-meat and non-veg/fruit food. My parents opted to save money on groceries by purchasing macaroni and cheese, spaghetti, and other pasta-rich boxed dinners. Even after the recession lifted, family dinners still consisted of the cheapest foods possible, which meant 2/3 of each meal was a gluten-rich pasta or bread, and the other 1/3, a meat. Veggies were few and far between, and canned whenever they found their way to the dinner table.

Going into my freshman year of high school, I was about 60 pounds overweight. I have lived on my own since my senior year of high school, and struggling to support myself has meant that a careful eye is trained on my spending at all times. Unfortunately, I see history repeating itself as I buy boxed meal after boxed meal much in the same fashion as my parents some 30 years ago.

All these years of filling my body with crap is catching up to me. Today, I am ashamed to say that I am roughly 170 pounds overweight. I have been lucky enough to have perfect blood pressure, no thyroid problems, no diabetes, perfectly functioning kidneys and liver, and no signs of any other serious problems. But not only will this not last forever, but some other symptoms of gluten sensitivity like bloating/abdominal pain, diarrhea, headaches, lethargy, and depression are very much apparent in my everyday life.

Recently, I spent a week in New Orleans during Mardi Gras. Shortly before going, I decided that upon return, it was The Time. The Time is Now to make a change and start ruling out (or in) specific causes of declining health and increasing weight.

Plan of attack

So now that we know how I got to this point, here is how I plan to get through the next 30 days without this pasta-and-bread-loving girl going crazy.

I will not be increasing any physical activity. I will not be exercising any more than I normally would. I will eat to feel full, just as I normally do. I have designed my 30-day challenge like this because I want to truly know if it is *gluten* that is causing the issue. If I start introducing more exercise, or eating less (as if I was on a diet) or any other significant change, I will not get objective results.

Meal plan, meal plan, meal plan. I am creating weekly meal plans, right down to snacks and what to take with me on our Social Nights (Monday through Thursday each week consists of different activities with friends that generally include group dinners).

Buy in advance, and only what’s needed. Each week, I’ll go to the grocery store and get what I need for the week’s meal plan. Right down to counting the number of oranges I’ll consume for breakfasts, or potatoes I’ll use for dinners.

Get the boyfriend involved slowly. I’ve never had to turn a skeptic around before, but it’s proving to be something I am not sure I can overcome. That said, I want him to not feel punished, or that he’s on a diet. I’d like to break him in slowly with easily substitutable things – like using corn tortillas for quesadillas, which have naturally gluten free ingredients.

Document the journey. Write in the blog. Record weight changes. Take note of mood changes, and write down when I have headaches. And as a bit of a reward, write recipes that pass the delicious! test in the Moleskin recipe book and share them here.

Read. Wheat Belly.


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